The Best Man for the Job?

Now that Bristol Palin’s had the chance to lose all her baby weight (ah to be 18 and no longer pregnant), she’s heading out to tell young’ins that abstinence is the only sure-fire way to prevent pregnancy. Which of course is true. But try telling a bunch of teenagers that instead of intercourse they should just stick with sexting; let me know how that works out. And while we could debate the merits of abstinence only education vs. a more comprehensive approach (including contraceptives), it wouldn’t fit nicely into a pre-packaged piece between commercial breaks; and I’d bet that neither you nor I have the in-depth knowledge to make headway on this topic. Which is why I’m thankful for Levi Johnston.
In a, let’s say exclusive, interview with CBS news, Johnston gave his opinions on the abstinence issue. See, his opinion matters because he’s a former high school hockey star and recent high school drop out. Oh, sorry. His opinion matters because he (in hockey terminology) scored on an empty net. Granted, if Bristol Palin, in her “Keep it in Your Pants ’09 Abstinence Tour” (sponsored by irony) is going to tell her side of the relationship/RNC staged engagement that was her connection to Johnston, then he has every right to defend himself and tell his side of the story. Which is exactly what he did a few months ago on Tyra Banks’ show: because nothing screams credibility like Tyra.
I’d never realized that to become an expert on teen pregnancy all one needs to is accidentally knock up your high school sweetheart who happens to be the daughter of the governor when said governor is tapped to be a vice presidential nominee. I doubt Johnston would be the expert that CBS believes him to be if he’d been able to wrap it tight for just a few more months. Had he done so, we might be engaging in an actual dialogue on this important topic, rather than letting the debate play out between a pair of former high school flames, treating it almost like it’s another meaningless high school argument. But if we really did discuss this issue there’d no doubt be much less gossip. And if we’ve all learned one thing from high school it’s that gossip might be the one thing that always draws our attention.